Holiday Tips and Humor

Every holiday I enjoy attending the Mary Ann Brandt Chritmas Show- it has become a holiday tradition. This year she had posting some holiday tips on her web site (www.maryannbrandt.com) . I wanted you to have these before the holidays officially begin.
For your reference- Mary Ann is a very rich elite socialite and only has the most expensive taste.

Holiday Party Do's and Dont's-


Chips — there is no place for any chip-type-thing in upper middle class/high society. This includes Potato Chips, Combos, Sun Chips and especially Doritos.


BYOB — “Bring your own beer/bottle” is for those on public assistance or 20-year-old college students whose parents aren’t multi-millionaires. To ask a guest to bring anything to a cocktail party, let alone the party, is simply not done. There is a time and place for “bringing your own.” A communal potluck or any event where you are simply providing the space for friends to gather is acceptable for BYOB, but not here.
Acceptable: “Why don’t we just watch the game at Mary Ann’s house”“Sure, come on over -- I’ll make chili!” “Then I’ll bring the beer” “Kewl!”
Unacceptable: “Are you coming to my pre-game party Saturday? Good, just bring a 12-pack or whatever you want to drink”


Television — Keep the TV off, unless you’ve invited friends for “Cocktails and the US Figure Skating Championships”.


Plastic cups — Top-shelf liquor deserves glass. Plastic cups are for those on public assistance or 20-year-old college students whose parents aren’t multi-millionaires.


Cocktail Weenies — those little white trash weenies, smothered in white trash barbecue sauce and baked in your white trash crock pot for hours until they’re tough as shoe leather and impossible to spear with the white trash toothpicks you’ve provided – toothpicks that have been fingered by every nasty white trash guest you’ve invited – even the white trash guests who have been having sex in the broom closet.



AFTER-THE-FAMILY-CHRISTMAS-MELTDOWN

God love ‘em, but a holiday weekend with the family is nerve splitting. After you’ve unloaded the Land Rover and watered the brittle tree, build a fire, put on your nightgown, fill a tall glass with lots of ice (not a cocktail glass, more like a Wendy’s Biggie cup), and fill it to the rim with enough Jack Daniels to wash down a Vicodin.


WRAPPING PRESENTS

I have mine wrapped professionally, but I realize most of you tackle the project with your own tape and scissors. Two bottles of Veuve Cliquot will get you through the evening. Add two bottles for each friend that comes calling. Buy gift bags with pretty tissue, because after the second bottle of Veuve, you’ll want to switch to liquor, and you’ll not want to fiddle with the tape anymore.

Blog Backlog-

First of all- I know I know I know- My Blog has been neglected and your are left wondering, "What's up with Andrew???" Alas- it is time to update.

I passed my CLU exam- I now have 6 out of 8 completed for this insurance designation. You might ask what will this do for him (I often ask the same thing)... it basically certifies that I know insurance and financial planning very very well. Many jobs in the insurance and financial planning industry will be opened to me with the completion of this designation.

Needless to say my life was pretty tied up in studying studying and more studying for this lovely test.

I have managed to have some holiday fun here and there too. The shopping is done & mostly wrapped. The tree is up and decorated (I am attaching a photo for your viewing pleasure)- and all the rest of the holiday "stuff" is under way. I really have a pretty light and stress free week ahead - Thank God- I work until mid-day Thursday and then I am off until Tuesday January 3rd. This is the longest non-medical time period off of work in like 6 years. I don't have many plans- other than family holiday fun, visiting with Laura (Welcome home from Bangledesh), and all the other usual holiday fun. My buddies Dan and Ray both have the entire week off too-- I'm sure we'll find some trouble to get into!

I hope everyone is doing well - Merry Christmas.

Winter Wonderland-

Columbus is now blanketed in a layer of snow and looks so pretty for Christmas. If I only didn't have to drive around in this crap life would be grand!

I think I may be slowly getting in the mood for the holidays- the snow really helped.

No big plans for the weekend- study study study- that about says it all. I would like to get 2 good workouts in and relax with some friends.

Laura comes home on the 17th! Yeah.

I hope you guys have a great weekend.

Where does the time go?

I have been very busy - but don't have a great deal to show for it.
Pretty much every minute of my personal time has been consumed studying for my exam as I strive towards my CLU designation. These courses are about as dry and boring and you can get. I am currently not feeling ready at all for the test- and it is next Friday- YIKES. I pray that soon and very soon that I will begin to feel more confident as I study.

It is cold cold cold here! It was 10 degrees this morning when I walked the dog this morning- now that is FRIGID!

I am having trouble getting into the holiday spirit- I went to the Holiday Pops at The Symphony last weekend, put up my tree, listening to Christmas music, and so forth- but I am just not in the spirit. Oh well-

I am very excited to have Laura returning to Ohio from Bangledesh soon- hopefully we can hang out and have lots good times. I know that it will be a major transition for her to come home and all- and that life is full of uncertainty right now- but for my own selfish reasons I will be glad to have her back in Ohio.

OK- my BLOG buddies- I need some updates for those of you neglecting your BLOGS (You know who you are). I confess that I have been bad too- but I posted today and I urge you to do the same- I need some news on my friends!

Take Care